false advertising

euphamisms: unnecesary translations for everyday items, places, and concepts.

they just clutter language. every euphamism is like a piece of tissue paper over the item to be sold; it dims the idea of the item and blurs its details to hide the bullcrap they're trying to sell.

now, i'm not saying it's the salesmens' fault; i know some great salesmen. salesmen are cool. it's these advertisers who feel like the less you can clearly grasp about a product, the better off the commercials are.

examples: let's take a simple item...a bar of soap. that's simple. now, if the advertisers just say, "it's a reliable, clensing, long-lasting bar that leaves you feeling fresh," i would be happy. but no; someone had to invent something to complicate the matter... soap scum. doesn't exist. i can swear on a copy of, "relational calculus for dummies" that it does not exist. seriously. when you use soap, i am 100 percent sure that you are not leaving some invisible substance on your skin after you rinse off. you heard it from me. no such thing. it's just something they fabricated out of thin air to get you to buy their soap.

yep. most of these commercial slurs are bull. your counter is NOT still dirty after you clean it, kids do NOT prefer juicy juice (fact: you can only legally call something fruit juice (ei, grape juice) unless it is 100 percent juice. "juicy" is not a fruit. juicy juice is not pure), and fiber one bars do NOT taste like chocolate (they do taste pretty good, though).

so, keep your eyes out. use critical thinking. don't let these small commercial buisnesses ruin your life with dumb products you don't need.

and again, salesmen are cool. i have never heard or heard of a salesman lie. ever.

keep reading, my friends.